We are familiar with the public grief rituals such as funerals, cremations or memorial services, but smaller more personal grief rituals also have their important part to play in the healing process. The tradtional Irish wake The tradition of holding a wake is one of the most ancient of our…
This blog, in a series looking at different aspects of the grieving process, looks at grief and minding ourselves. There may be times, when we feel we have entered a state of freeze and stuckness. Carrying on with normal every day life feels pointless at times - so we might…
My previous blog looked at how the nervous system states of fight, flight and freeze are involved in how we feel from moment to moment - including strong emotions like anxiety, fear, panic and anger, OCD and phobias, even trauma and PTSD. This blog will focus especially on the freeze…
Most of us have heard of the terms fight, flight and freeze, but exactly how do these states relate to how humans feel? This is the first of a series of blogs about how understanding how our nervous system works can be a powerful step towards managing our feelings and…
This final article about grounding tools and techniques introduces you to my favourite grounding tool! It also looks at mindful distraction and self-soothing. All of us could sometimes do with a little grounding and all grounding techniques are designed to do one thing: to help us to connect with the…
This blog gives a list of powerful physical grounding tools. All of us could sometimes do with a little grounding! Although grounding does not solve the problem that is contributing to your unpleasant emotions, it does provide a temporary way to gain control over your feelings and prevent things from…
What is Grounding? People often use the expression “I need to stay grounded” when they feel themselves being pulled too much into overthinking and worrying about things or being pulled into very strong emotions. As a counsellor, I find that knowing and using grounding tools and techniques can make a…
Reduce Stress by Managing Uncertainty When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves. —Victor Frankl This blog looks at ways we can reduce stress by managing uncertainty. As I wrote in my previous blog, human beings crave security. We need to have…
When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves. —Victor Frankl. During 2020, managing change and uncertainty has been a constant challenge for us all. Today we wait for the new lockdown restrictions to be announced in Ireland, and it's hard to keep…
This blog looks at the challenging topic of dealing with a narcissistic boss. Many managers can be demanding and difficult at times but a true narcissist has behaviour traits that do not change and can make your working life a nightmare. Working under a boss who is unpredictable, self-centred, and…
The effects of having a narcissistic boss Narcissism, or Narcissistic Personality Disorder, can be almost as hard to deal with in the workplace as it is in personal relationships. Not only are you forced into close contact with your boss every day, but you are also dependent on him or…
This is part two of how to deal with someone else's difficult behaviour, taking some advice from professional crisis intervention teams (who work in the fields of health care, law enforcement etc). They use particular tactics to deal with difficult people and it is well worth learning these and keeping…